Things Are Looking Good

They patio is finally finished and the garden is blooming. Having a backyard sure is an absolutely great thing. We've been working hard and getting all that done and I'm looking forward until it's all finished and we can sit out there and enjoy every thing. Just today I put the BBQ grill on the patio, the table and the chairs and it looks great. I wish we'd have some actual patio furniture, but what we have will do for now.

The temperatures are great too, especially considering that it's not even summer yet. It's gonna be a hell of a summer, and we sure need to have an umbrella ready or we'll be grilled by the sun. Especially looking forward to the evenings we're gonna spend out there around the bonfire. We're just have to have some bug spray, because those mosquitoes are eating me alive. It is finally something we're doing for just us and it feels great.

Kelly is now officially 9 days smoke free, and I love it. She's in a better mood lately, but I still have to be strong. I know she can do it and I'm very proud of her, I just can't mention it or I get yelled at... LOL.

So things are looking much better than in the beginning of the year, and even though I'd never thought I'd say that back in the beginning of 2010, but it is going to be a great year.

A Proud Moment

Four days ago, my wife handed me her pack of cigarettes and told me to put it in the refrigerator. I looked at her, not understanding anything, so she told me that cigarettes stay fresher in the refrigerator and that she's less likely to grab for a cigarette when they're not next to her. I know that it takes a lot to quit smoking, that it's hard but definitely possible if you really want it. She told me before that she's not ready to quit, and I answered her that there's no point in trying then, because you can only do it when your mind is set to it.

I knew the moment she handed me those cigarettes that she was serious. Serious with quitting smoking, or at least cutting it down for right now. There's been times she smoked a lot, hell that includes me too, times when we smoked about one and a half packs a day each and sometimes even more. 30+ cigarettes a day was the usual and the day she started to cut down she only had 11 cigarettes. 11!! Ain't that great? When I look at her I can see that it's not easy for her, but after 6 months of quitting I am ready to support her. I feel strong enough to help her reach her goal. She's doing a great job and I can't even express how proud I am.

She's doing it all on her own, and she's even cut down on the coffee. Instead of 12+ cups a day she's having 2 cups. Cigarettes and coffee definitely is her biggest addiction - besides me that is =] ! No seriously, that was what her breakfasts used to involve - cigarettes and coffee. Cutting down on two addictions is a really big step.

So baby, if you read this, I just want to let you know how very proud I am of you! You're holding up so great and I am here whenever you need some help. Let me be your rock you can lean on whenever you need a break or whenever you doubt yourself. Let me be your punching bag whenever you feel down. I am here for you and I know you can succeed. I know what you're fighting for and I could not be happier.

I love you and always will - Forever & Ever, Babe!!

2010 - The Year of Changes

Like every new year, you decide on a resolution and within a month, or perhaps even a couple of weeks, the resolution is broken. We all know it, we've all done it - once, twice or even more times.

I've done it too, many many times before. Most of the time I've set my resolutions on losing weight and quitting smoking, but so far I've never succeeded. I went on a diet for maybe 4 weeks and then I got tired of it and just went back to the regular way. Thinking about it now I sure could kick myself in the ass, if only I could reach. But anyhow, last August I decided on quitting smoking. Yes, I've done it many times before, the longest was 1 year without a cigarette, but I kept returning to those smoking lung sticks. So on 08/15/09 I decided to quit for good. Not only for me, but for Kelly as well. I want that my little sperms swim in super speed and make sure they get a place in the egg. I want to be able to run around with our kids without breathing like crazy and I don't want the kids to grow up surrounded by cigarettes. My parents both smoked when I was young and studies show that children are more likely to smoke if their parents do. Now I don't want to blame my parents for me smoking, but I'm just saying. Those are the reasons why I quit and I know I'll never smoke a cigarette again. I want to be ready to support my wife when she decides on quitting and I hope she is proud of me and sees that it is possible, you just have to want it!

So that's what happened in the middle of last year. But last year is past. What matters is what's happening now, here and now in the present. And on January 3rd, a healthier lifestyle has begun. We've decided on eating healthy, exercising and keeping an eye on our weight and so far it's going great. I've lost a total of 9.4 pounds and it feels great. Who would have thought that switching to whole wheat bread, whole wheat pasta, red potatoes, light stuff and organic fruits and vegetables would still be enjoyable. Well let me tell you: It is delicious, not to mention good for you. I try to exercise at least 1 hour per day with 2 break days a week. It's not always easy but Kelly sure pushes me through. I think she really enjoys working me that hard and hearing me screaming, but after the hour is over it feels great. 'Failure is NOT an option' is our motto and if I can barely push the dumbbells up some more, I just repeat that saying in my head. My goal for this year is to lose at least 100 pounds. Big goal huh? Yeah I know, but I can do it. Why you ask? Because I WANT it. I know I said it before, but it's different now. It's totally different. I had to switch the switch in my head first to be able to let my body go through all that hard work and I finally succeeded to switch it in my head.

I noticed that whatever you want to do, no matter how hard it might be, is possible as long as your head is set to it... because...

...'FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION'